Thursday, December 29, 2011

Let the poison out

Do you masturbate?

If yes, then stop it!!!

Sounds like child talk to me, but I have a point here!!!!

Don’t get me wrong, I won’t tell you that you will go blind or that you will grow hair in your hand!

Here are other ones: http://www.yourtango.com/201055179/5-bogus-masturbation-myths

What I will tell you is this: you will grow ……. Old and alone!

No, have no fear, you won’t go blind, but you will go blind for women, you will stop seeing them when you get into the habit of masturbating.

How do I know this?

Let me introduce you to an ex colonel at masturbation = ME!

I was a heavy masturbator when I was you and to a large degree last fear years, if there was a world title in masturbation, I’d be probably in the second position after a Chinese.

Just to give you an idea.

Here is what would happen:

My friends would ask me to go out with them, I’ll invent a bogus alibies to watch porn and masturbate.

I was addicted, it took me a lot of energy and good will to quite, and god do I miss it!!!

I still remember, when I was addicted to porn, if you put a naked woman in front of me, I don’t get excited about her, but hey hey hey, film her with three dudes and a midget from Pakistan and make me download the movie from the internet, I’d get all the excitement in the world for it.

I’m not ridiculing myself; I’m giving you a very important thing in my past life.

Needless to tell you that I wasn’t dating any woman at that time and when I was asked by my mother, I’d invent all kinds of lies to cover it.

In one word: quite!

1 comment:

  1. very funny, it's not a poison at all!!!
    it seems that you've been lonely for quite some times now jordane!

    ReplyDelete